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Was I just a horny teenager or was I attracted to guys as well? Could I be straight but also into masturbating to photos of cocks? I wasn’t using gay porn exclusively, but it was in heavy rotation. My collection grew until I had a pretty decent folder and was routinely masturbating to these images. I started spending more time in chat rooms talking to guys. But Then I Didn’t Delete hotstud.jpg Did I? I didn’t want to be turned on by images of naked dudes. I’d always been turned on by women, and up until now, I’d only ever wanted a girlfriend.
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I didn’t know what to think or how to proceed. Would I be tormented more than I already was? I came from a loving family but would my parents still accept me? Was it time to kiss my dream of having a wife and kids goodbye? Making friends at school was already challenging for me. I didn’t know how people close to me would react. I didn’t have a concept of sexuality at that point, but I knew that being gay was going to fuck things up for me. I’d had two girlfriends by the time I saw hotstud.jpg so in my mind I was straight. My dad picked me up after and I was sure he could smell sex on me. I lost my virginity to a girl at a party when I was 15 years old. But getting turned on by a picture of a naked dude? I had a hard time swallowing that. My eyes wandered to his cock, and I got turned on. I quickly went to close the file, but then I hesitated. Big muscles, nice tan, and a huge hard cock. Then one day I opened up a file named hotstud.jpg.Ī hot stud indeed, letting it all hang out. You know, your typical straight dude porn. Every time I logged on to AOL, I’d hear the iconic “You’ve got mail” and open up my inbox to a plethora of porn. I’d go to a chatroom, chat with some strangers, and end up trading pictures with them. People would meet up online, engage in cybersex, organize sex dates, or trade pornographic pictures and videos. There were chatrooms for just about everything, but the most popular ones had to do with sex and porn. Virtual meeting rooms where folks came together to chat about a variety of topics. If Craigslist was around, I certainly didn’t know about it.įor me, that meant getting my jollies out the old fashioned way, via AOL chatrooms.
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Unsplash / Celine Preher Before Tinder There Was AOL